Top Five Dumbest Things People Did in the Bible

1 John 2:1, Psalm 32:1-5

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Hi there. My name is Tony Pittenger. I’m the pastor at Bethany Lutheran Church out in Port Orchard, Washington. And when I was a teenager, there was a television show on late nights, and the host had these blue cards, and he would do a top ten of this, top five of that. And so sort of in that tradition, dear fellow redeemed, ladies and gentlemen, I present to you top five dumbest things that people have done in the Bible.

All right, number five, messing around with the wife of a Nazarite. This goes back to Samson. It’s in Judges chapter 14. Samson had been promised his wife. We don’t even know her name, but she was eventually given to someone else. And, well, read Judges 14. You’ll see that did not go well for those people.

Number four, dumbest things that people have done in the Bible, making fun of a prophet’s hair, especially a bald prophet. This is in Second Kings chapter two, and there are some kids making fun of Elijah and his lack of hair. That was a very dumb thing to do, disrespectful. As two she bears came and well, taught them a lesson they wouldn’t forget.

Number three, chasing God’s people into the heart of the Red Sea. This is Exodus chapter 14 as Pharaoh and his army, even though there are walls of water on the right and on the left. Hey, if the Israelites are safe down there, maybe we will be to. And in they go.

Number two, going sailing when God tells you to go to Nineveh. That’s the prophet Jonah. And I think you know that story well. Jonah got an up close sort of an immersion class in marine biology for disobeying what God had told him to do.

But the number one, number one, probably dumbest thing that you can find humans doing in the Bible hiding from God after you’ve sinned. This is Genesis chapter three. This is Adam and Eve, and they’ve been told not to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. They fall for the devil’s lies. They fall for his temptations, which is a terrible thing, which is a sin. But then, when God comes looking for them, calling out to them, they hide.

And if you think about what a natural thing, maybe because we’ve inherited that from them, don’t we do that too? Don’t we hide when we’ve sinned? Don’t we avoid God? We avoid his church? Avoid his Word? Because we don’t want to be confronted with what we’ve done. We hide from him when we need him absolutely the most.

The Bible tells us

If anyone does sin, we have an Advocate before the Father: Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. (1 John 2:1)

Hiding from him is the worst thing that we could possibly do. I wish the story said that Adam and Eve went running up to him and saying, Lord, Lord, Father, we’ve done something wrong. We did something we weren’t supposed to do. But they don’t. But God does. God goes looking for Adam and Eve to tell them about a Savior. Psalm 32.

How blessed is the person whose rebellion is forgiven, whose sin is covered. How blessed is the person whose guilt the Lord does not charge against him, in whose spirit there is no deceit. When I kept silent, my bones wasted away as I groaned all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy on me. My moisture was dried up by the droughts of summer. I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover up my guilt. I said, “I will confess my rebellion to the Lord,” and you forgave the guilt of my sin. (Psalm 32:1-5)

My friends, dear fellow redeemed, remember those dumb things we naturally do. We hide from God. We avoid him. Remember, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ, the Righteous One. And remember that blessed are you, all those with whom the Lord does not remember does not count their iniquity. Confess our sins. Run to him when we fail. Run to his loving arms because we have a Savior, Jesus Christ.

I pray you’ll remember that. And until we meet again, God bless and keep all of you. Amen.